Pumpkin Patch

Lana has been asking for a "kitty cat" for months. She wasn't that fond of our dog and she desperately wanted a cat to play with. Once the dog was gone we thought it would be a good idea to start looking for a cat for our family. After a couple of weeks we found just the right one at our local animal shelter.

His name was Pumpkin and Lana thought his full name should be Pumpkin Patch, after all she still asks to go to the Pumpkin Patch. He was a cute orange color, he was 7 months old and he came from a family with kids. When he tolerated all of the kids so well when we went to visit him we knew he would be a perfect fit for our family. Two days after visiting him he came home with us and he's definitely been a great addition to our family!

The kids were so excited but their excitement scared him to death! He hid under the couch for a very long time, finally coming out after the kids had gone to bed. It didn't take long for Nathan to make friends with him, but it took a lot longer for him to get used to the energy of our three youngest children. Every time the little kids saw him they would squeal with delight for "PUMPKIN" and run after him. It's been two months since we brought him home and he's finally to the point where he will roam the house when the kids are awake, even laying down on the floor in front of them and allowing them to pet him. He even allows Tate to pick him up and carry him around. He is definitely everything that we had hoped a for in a pet for our kids.

Pinterest Makes Me a Better Mom!

I love doing activities with the kids, but I can't always come up with new ideas or creative ideas that will keep their attention but after joining Pinterest I have been able to find a ton of ideas that the kids love!!! My plan is to share all of the fun with you!

I try to do as many fun and educational activities with the kids at home as I can. Lana and Jackson are 2 1/2 years old and very curious about their letters, numbers, colors and shapes. Lana is constantly asking for homework! Tate is 4 years old and has a hard time sitting still so traditional worksheets and workbooks aren't a good fit with him. He also doesn't like to recite his numbers or letters so we have to trick him into participating by making activities silly.

One of the very first activities I tried was a sensory bin full of uncooked rice. I hid our alphabet magnets in it and let the kids take turns finding the letters. As they found the letters we talked about each one and thought of words that started with them. They loved this little treasure hunt!

Our Budget Makeover: Dave Ramsey Style

At the start of 2012 I made a few New Years resolutions. One of them was to make our money work harder. We've always paid our bills on time and in full, but we were never really good at keeping track of our monthly expenses or saving for a rainy day.

I heard about Dave Ramsey's "Total Money Makeover" when our church did his "Financial Peace University" course. At the time TJ and I weren't able to participate in the study because we weren't attending Sunday School after the twins were born. TJ on the other hand had been already been listening to his radio program and really liked his approach to money. It only took me a couple of days to read his book "Total Money Makeover" and I was ready to start! It took us a few weeks to get our budget worked out, but it has really been helpful for keeping us on track.

I loved his concept of budgeting every dollar. We now have a budget category for everything and have an emergency fund all of those expenses that don't occur monthly. I track where our money is going daily. For the first time in years we've managed to SAVE money!!! We also have not used a credit card since January 1st, 2012. Almost FIVE MONTHS credit card free!!! We have also been able to make progress on paying down our debt!!! It is amazing how fast it goes down if you are not adding to it! In addition to our credit cards we still have car loans, a home improvement loan and my student loans but they are gradually going down as we continue to make our monthly payments on them. It will take us a couple of years to pay off all of the debt we accrued, but we are well on our way to being DEBT FREE! It feels so good knowing that we have our money under control. We have so much going on, it's nice to know that we don't have to worry about this.

If you need a budget makover I highly recommend Dave Ramsey.

I love this slogan from WWII and I try to repeat it to myself everytime I'm about to spend money! It really does help you think twice about the money you're about to spend.

St. Patrick's Day 2012

St. Patrick's Day is so fun in our house. We love to wear green and have your traditional corned beef and cabbage for dinner. This year St. Patrick's Day fell on a Saturday and we were just so busy that we had to postpone our celebration until later in the following week. Unfortunately TJ was traveling for work that week so he wasn't able to celebrate with us.

We had fun St. Patrick's Day decorations, the kids all wore their green shirts and I made lots of yummy food for dinner! We enjoyed corned beef and cabbage, Irish soda bread and green cupcakes with green icing!! None of the kids really liked the corned beef and cabbage, but they all loved the Irish soda bread and the cupcakes!!

We had such a mild winter and the weather that day was gorgeous so I decided to take the kids outside for some pictures on the front porch. I love this one of Lana trying to kiss Jackson and his reaction to it! The picture of Nathan in front of our blue front door really brings out the blue of his eyes!! Tate asked me to take his picture on the stepping stones. So many fun memories!

Boots George Baker and Skye Madison Spahr

Skye was our first baby. The first thing we loved together besides each other. When we got married in 2001 I knew I wanted a puppy.

Something had been missing in my life since my childhood dog died when TJ and I were dating. Boots was the perfect dog for a kid. Your basic mutt: half Pekingese and half terrier. My mom brought him home when I was only 5 and in Kindergarten. My sister and I loved him from the moment we set eyes on him. But when he chewed up my first Barbie I wasn't very happy with him. Through those tough teenage years it sometimes felt like he was the only one I could talk to and who truly listened. He was the most memorable one-eyed curly-tailed dog! No one I knew had a dog like him and I loved that he was so unique. He was almost 16 years old when he had a stroke and we had to say good-bye. It was one of the saddest days I had ever experienced up to that point.

I thought by getting our own puppy I could have some of that magic back that I had lost. Little did I know that we had picked out a little terror!! Sky Madison. She was the cutest little puppy at the pet shop. I had originally picked out a little blond collie, but when I went back the next night with TJ a little girl was carrying it out. Devastated I picked this little black puppy instead. She was a mutt too.  A mix of border collie and shar-pei. As it turns out the shar-pei made her cute, but it also gave her a naturally bad attitude and the border collie gave her an unlimited amount of energy. She loved swimming in water and running. Boy could she run! She also loved to chew on wood and carpet. I've never seen a dog that would eat so much wood! She ate wood trim, our wood fence and our wood window sills. She disliked anything with wheels. Including bikes, skateboards, roller blades and scooters. She was smart and stubborn. Somewhere I read that you could train your dog to ring wind chimes when they needed to use the bathroom. I thought it was a pretty cool idea. I hung a set right by our apartment door and it only took her a few days to get the hang of it. It was a nice alternative to incessant barking since we lived in an apartment building. Unfortunately she soon turned it against us. She would ring those bells with her nose for everything!! She especially liked to ring them when she was mad at us. Shoving her nose into them violently and repeatedly to express her displeasure.

As we started to have kids it became clear that she was not their biggest fan. She resented the intrusion. While she never really bit any of them, she did like to give them warning nips when they were doing something she didn't like and she would herd them as if they were her flock of sheep. As they all got older she became less tolerant of them preferring to spend her time outside alone or in any room of the house that they weren't in. She did not turn out to be the loving family pet that I had envisioned when we brought her home as a puppy, but I loved her anyway.

As she approached her eleventh birthday her body started to fail her. First her eyes developed cataracts and she couldn't see after dusk. This made her vulnerable and defensive. Then she blew out one of her knees so badly that she could only walk on three legs. Even with pain medication she still couldn't stand to walk on it and it was so badly injured that surgery would not have helped. She was in so much pain that it had become apparent that it was time to say good-bye to her. We prepared the kids for what would happen, had them say their good-byes and then I took her to our vet. When I got home TJ, Nathan and Tate took her to my parents house, held a little funeral service and buried her under their apple tree. Nathan and Tate even made a little cross for her. Every once in a while Lana will tell me that "Skye went to Heaven" and I say "Yes she did. She went to Doggie Heaven." I miss her but I know saying good-bye was the best thing I could have done for her.

I Love You Day 2012

Each year for Valentine's Day I like to do a little something for each of the kids to let them know how much they are loved. This year we did a few decorations and they each had a book, a Valentine's Day t-shirt and a special cookie. All of their little goodies were waiting for them at the breakfast table when they woke up.

There are many days when we are struggling to manage the needs of four kids when I wonder what life would be like around  here if we had stopped after we had the first two. It probably would have been a lot easier, it probably would have been a lot quieter and it certainly would not have been as expensive. But it's days like Valentine's Day that remind me that each one of my kids have been a wonderful source of fun, laughter and love! In the quiet after all the kids have fallen asleep at night I reflect on each day, wondering how in the world I survived it, but also feeling so blessed and grateful for having been privileged enough to live it!! Not everyone could handle our crazy life, but I LOVE the fact that I was given the opportunity to love these four crazy kids God gave us!

That Explains A Lot!!!

It's no secret that we've been struggling with Tate and his behavior for a long time. He started seeing a variety of therapists when he was just 18 months old. We've always known that there was something different about him, something that made him special. We call him "the monkey in the middle" for a reason! But, for a long time we just assumed that his speech delays were the cause of his behavior problems. When your child can't talk until he's almost 3 years old it forces him to learn other ways to communicate and satisfy his needs. His inability to express his emotions verbally caused a lot of conflict in our home. Recently we began to suspect that there was something more going on with him, something that would explain why he was still having so many problems even though his speech has come a long way in the last 18 months.

We recently went in search of answers. Tate had a wonderful evaluation at Children's Hospital's Pediatric Neuropsychology Program/Center for Autism Spectrum Disorders. The results have provided us with more answers than we could have hoped for and we came away from our meeting with a plan of action!! Tate has ADHD: Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. What complicates his case is that his ADHD is combined with strong intellectual abilities and an above average speech/language delay. They also said he has no impulse control. (I've always known this, but just never knew how to describe it!) His difficulties with impulse control make discipline AND reward systems ineffective. He thinks too quickly for them to have any affect on his behavior. He expects the world adjust to him 90% of the time, which it rarely does. He's definitely a kid that requires a creative approach to learning and behavior modification since his natural tendency is to disregard rules and boundaries and do the opposite of what is asked of him.

Another piece of his puzzle is something called ODD: Oppositional Defiance Disorder. While he is not being diagnosed with this disorder at this time, his behavior fits most of the disorders characteristics. They typically do not diagnose children of Tate's age with this because their behaviors are much easier to correct than an older child's. A child with ODD will have 4 out of 8 of the following symptoms:

• Actively refuses to comply with majority's requests or consensus supported rules (Tate)

• Performs deliberate actions to annoy others (Tate)

• Angry and resentful of others

• Argues often (Tate)

• Blames others for his or her own mistakes

• Has few or no friends or has lost friends (Tate)

• Is causing constant trouble at school

• Spiteful or seeks revenge (Tate)

• Touchy or easily annoyed (Tate)

For Tate, an inability to sleep is a persistent problem. He is frequently one of last members of our house to go to bed and the first one awake. This is a problem for many children with ADHD. To help with this his doctors have recommended a dose of Melatonin before bedtime. We are very hopeful that this will help our household significantly!! Sharing a room with his older brother often leads to them both being up until 10 or 11 at night. If Tate sleeps more than we all sleep more! To read more about ADHD, sleep problems and melatonin I recommend the following article:

http://akanemd.hubpages.com/hub/ADHD-Melatonin

Our course of action from here is to increase Tate's Speech Therapy sessions by adding a private speech therapist, adding Behavior Therapy and Occupational Therapy to help him learn how to function in the world better and how to interact with his teachers and peers in a positive way. We are also seeking to enroll him the Pre-Kindergarten program at Nathan's elementary school so that his Speech Therapist at the school can work with him in a classroom setting 5 half-days a week. Unfortunately this will be a difficult process because their Pre-Kindergarten is an Inclusive Program that enrolls 6 special needs children and 6 typical peers in each classroom. Tate is not considered a good candidate to be a typical peer because of his speech delays. These students are encouraged to model good behaviors as well as good language and good classroom habits. We are hoping that Tate's diagnosis and his problems in his current classroom at his private preschool will now qualify to be one of the other 6 students.

To finish, I'd like to share part of a post I started in January but never posted. It explains a lot of what we've been struggling with, but as I read it now I'm hopeful because we finally have some answers and can put names to a lot of what we have been struggling with.

Tate had a speech delay. He still has trouble pronouncing most words and has a limited vocabulary, but in all other areas he's considered normal. But we just clash. I love him more than I can say and feel guilty because I can't seem to connect with him because he doesn't like affection. He doesn't like to be read to. He doesn't like to sing. He doesn't like to interact with people in general, but he typically responds better to men than to women. He spends most of his day telling me "me hate you mommy," "me no like you" and doing everything he can think of to physically hurt me, damage my belongings or to hurt my feelings. I've been stabbed with a pencil and had dinner spit in my face. Most days are spent with hair pulling, scratching, biting, hitting and kicking. He hates getting dressed, he hates leaving the house, he hates going to school and daily fights ensue just to get him dressed for his speech therapy and pre-school, let alone getting him in the car and in his classrooms. The only time he's happy is when he's watching TV or playing in the dirt. It's enough to wear a person down mentally. I'm not sure what went wrong- I don't even know how to fix it. I worry about him. I'm so tired of never being able to let my guard down. I feel trapped in my own house because I can't leave with him. I can't take him anywhere for fear he'll disappear or do something to endanger himself or others. He has a tendency not to recognize danger and will run through parking lots and disappear in stores frequently forcing me to choose between finding him or leaving the twins in an unsafe situation. It's never a good position to be in. He loves to play with knives. He's not good at communicating with other kids, which makes him not good at sharing. He loves to be destructive, destroying things that other kids have built or games that they are playing. I feel like nothing I do or say is getting through to him. I feel like nothing is ever going to change. I am working on accepting that his personality is always going to set him apart from the other kids in our family and other kids his age. It's also about accepting what I can change and what I can't. I can't change the personality he was born with. I can't change the fact that he has a speech delay and what that delay did to the way he interacts and communicates with others. I can't change the way this affected his personality or the personality traits he was born with. I hope 2012 brings some answers. I hope it brings some peace. I need to accept the things that I can not change and move forward. Move forward with finding some answers and finding some solutions.

I am so happy to report that we are well on our way to finding the answers and the solutions! I'm praying that all of these efforts help him to succeed in life!!

20 Questions with Tate at 4

Every once in awhile I like to conduct little interviews with the kids to view the world from their perspective. It's a great way to find out the things that are really important in their life. Here are Tate's Answers to 20 Questions when he's 4 years old.

1. What is your favorite color? Gween (green)
2. What is your favorite toy? Dinosaurs and Tractors
3. What is your favorite fruit? Oranges
4. What is your favorite TV show? Tom and Jerry
5. What is your favorite thing to eat? Oranges. I already told you dat silly!
6. What is your favorite outfit? Dinosaur shirt
7. What is your favorite game? "like all dos games." (As he points to the shelf with the games- I like all those games.)
8. What is your favorite snack? Pretzels
9. What is your favorite song? "me hate songs."
10. What is your favorite animal? Deer
11. What is your favorite book? book about frogs
12. Who is your best friend? Pumpkin (our cat)
13. What is your favorite cereal? "me hate cereal"
14. What is your favorite thing to do outside? "dig in dirt with tractors"
15. What is your favorite drink? milk or juice
16. What is your favorite holiday? Christmas
17. What do you like to take to bed with you at night? moon that plays Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star
18. What is your favorite thing to eat for breakfast? Cheese
19. What do you want for dinner on your birthday? (No Answer)
20. What do you want to be when you grow up? "a kitty cat."

Tate's 4th Birthday

For his Fourth Birthday Tate choose wanted to have "dat cat and mouse show" party, by which he meant he wanted to have a "Tom and Jerry" themed party. I wasn't surprised since Tom and Jerry is currently his favorite television show and I was pleasantly surprised to find lots of "Tom and Jerry" party supplies.

Since Daddy was out of town for work on Tate's birthday we waited to have his party until Saturday February 11th. He really loves playing board games right now so we decided to get him three different games: "Cars" Memory, "Cars" Sorry Sliders and Critter Crash (a cute kids version of Jenga!).

He every minute of his birthday party. He was so excited to see his "cat and mouse" cake and all of the presents. He was so excited about his presents that he couldn't wait to open them-as soon as he saw a present he opened it!!When it came time to blow out the candles on his cake he was so funny! He didn't even wait for everyone to finish singing, he blew them out and then hid under the table before running out of the room completely!  Unfortunately he's not a huge fan of the camera so it was hard getting pictures of him at his party.

 By far his favorite presents were the fishing gear. He loves anything related to fishing! Aunt Pam gave him a green fishing net, the Burgans gave him fishing bait and bobbers, and Aunt Bon and Uncle Bob gave him a camoflouge hat with a flashlight in the brim! I have never seen a little boy who loves fishing gear as much as he does.

He was so tired by the end of his party that he actually fell asleep before everyone had left. I'm so glad he had fun at his party!

Happy Birthday Buddy! We love every crazy minute we've had with you in the last four years! You certainly keep us on our toes and are a one of a kind little boy!!!

Flying By

I can not believe how quickly this year is flying by. We are already half way through April and my last official post was about our New Year's celebration!! How can that be???

We have certainly been busy and as usual I have a lot to catch up on. We celebrated Tate's 4th Birthday, Valentine's Day, St. Patrick's Day and Easter. Nathan and Tate started playing t-ball for the first time, Nathan has been staying after school for Running Club to prepare to run the 5th Annual Deer Dash 5k, Tate has been going to Speech Therapy twice a week and attending preschool three mornings a week. We lost our dog in February due to an injury and old age and adopted a kitten in March. I've also been dilligently working on my three New Year's resolutions: using Dave Ramsey's "Total Money Makeover" to get our financial lives in order, reading through the Bible in one year to get my spirtual life in order, and going to the gym more often so that I can be a healthier mom! Throw in homework, crafts, breaking up fights, cleaning up food messes, laundry and lots of playtime with four crazy kids and you'll understand why I have very little time for blogging.

I'm hoping to slowly get caught up, but that's 2012 so far in a nutshell!

Wordless Wednesday: My Daily Struggle

Ringing in 2012

This story starts at the beginning of 2011. On New Years Eve I got this bright idea that I wanted to throw the kids a big New Years Eve party and make it a yearly family tradition. I was so excited about my idea! I even found some great New Years Eve party supplies on clearance at our local Party City. I packed them away and waited to use them for an entire year.

Finally, a whole year later it was finally time to throw our New Years Party. The kids are still pretty young, so really only Nathan understand what we were celebrating, but it was still a fun night. I got all the decorations out and made a great little table display with matching and themed items that included plates, napkins, champagne glasses, hats and noise makers. We had tons of appetizers for dinner. The kids really enjoyed the mini-corndogs, potato skins, fried mozzarella sticks, wings and fried green beans. They drank apple juice out of their special party glasses.

We also decided to start a new tradition as a family: a time capsule. I bought a simple clear jar from Target that we plan to fill throughout the year with lots of little trinkets and photos that will remind us of 2012. We started the jar by putting in some confetti from our New Years Eve party.

While we waited for midnight we let the kids get their sleeping bags out and watch a Harry Potter movie in the basement. When the movie was over we switched to a Three Stooges marathon. Nathan and Tate, having never seen the Three Stooges, thought the show was hilarious! It was great listening to them laugh hysterically together at such simple little gags. The twins made it to 10:30, but were just too exhausted to stay up any longer. Tate passed out on the couch at 11:30. When the ball in New York City's Times Square finally dropped, it was just Nathan, TJ and I welcoming in 2012.

2011 was a hard year for me. I struggled a lot with a lot of things, but I'm hopeful that 2012 will bring great things! I know it will bring three very special birthdays. I can't believe my babies will be 7, 4 and 3 this year!! Time is just flying past me!

Our family on New Years Day 2012.

Hiatus

I apologize for the hiatus from the blog. The holidays were just exhausting for me and we've had a lot going on that I haven't really had the energy to talk about. I've also been stuck in my own head a lot more lately. I'm working on making some personal changes for 2012 and writing a post about what's been going on, what I've been struggling with and the steps I'm taking to make 2012 a great year!

I'm hoping to get back into the blog with the New Year and really start to write more regular posts. I will probably be doing a lot more "Flashbacks" becauase I have a lot of events that I want to record for our family history. I hope everyone had a Happy Halloween, a Happy Thanksgiving, a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!!

Christmas Letter 2011

Dear Family and Friends,

                This year has just flown by for our family. It seems we went from May to December in the blink of an eye. The kids have had a lot of milestones this year and we’ve had a lot of fun. We’ve struggled with some growing pains too, with each of the kids trying to find their individual identities in a large family. Life is always crazy and loud at our house, but it’s never dull.

                Nathan turned 6 in May and entered the First Grade at our local elementary school. He enjoys camping, fishing and hunting. He has had the opportunity to join our local Cub Scout troop and he completed the Deer Dash, a 3.1 mile race sponsored by his school in May.  We were so proud of him for committing to training for the race and for completing it!

                Tate will turn 4 in January and he is a very energetic little boy. He works very hard each week with his Speech Therapist and has made amazing improvements in his pronunciations and his vocabulary.  He started attending pre-school three days a week in September and has reluctantly enjoyed it. He loves fishing and watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and Tom and Jerry cartoons. He also loves to play trucks, boats and campers with Nathan.

                Lana and Jackson celebrated their second birthday in October. Lana loves all things girly. She loves the colors purple and pink. She loves to talk and her language is very advanced for her age. She loves to watch Sesame Street, color and play with her baby dolls and princess stuff. She has also mastered the potty! She says the funniest things and she consistently surprises us with her manners by saying thank you, you’re welcome, excuse me and bless you. Jackson is the sweetest little boy.  He’s very shy and quiet, only talking when he needs to. He loves giving kisses and hugs and you can always count on him for a smile. He loves to play with his fire trucks and trains. He also loves to play with Lana. He is very attached to his sister, often sleeping in her bed with her or next to her bed on the floor. They both enjoy their time in the playroom at the YMCA when I can actually get to the gym.

                As for myself, the kids keep me busy. I spend most of my time taking them to and from their schools and their appointments. I enjoy my occasional trips to the gym at the YMCA.  TJ is still working at Microsoft. He travels a lot for work, but we enjoy having him home when he’s not traveling. He’s also a co-leader with Nathan’s Cub Scout den.  We were honored to help celebrate two big events in the Spahr family this year with TJ’s sister Robin getting married in May and our first niece, Brooke Elizabeth Spahr, arriving in October to Dan and Stephany.

                Our family is preparing for a big move in 2012! We are hoping to put our 3 bedroom 2 bath house on the market and start the process of building a new home that will have more space for our family. We are very excited to see what 2012 will bring our family.  We wish your family health, happiness and a year full of new adventures!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

One Word Wednesday: T's

Flashback Friday: Tate Gets Stitches

 Every August the Higgins family gathers for the Blairs Valley Picnic. It's something that they've been doing for almost a century. It's one of those family traditions that holds a lot of fun memories. It's held by my grandfather's childhood church at their picnic grounds. They have live gospel music, fun little toys to purchase, some of the best ice cream you've ever tasted and the best stream for catching crayfish.

The picnic is always a big hit with the kids because of the toys and ice cream, but especially because of the stream. In August of 2009 when we attended the picnic I was 7 months pregnant with the twins and Tate was just 18 months old. He was loving every minute of playing in the stream. After a couple of minutes he got adventurous and walked off from my dad and Nathan. When he climbed out of the stream he fell and cut  his hand on a rock.

After taking a look at the cut my mom decided that it needed stitches. We left Nathan with my Aunt Pam while my parents went with Tate and I to the Emergency Room. I really expected this to be a horrible experience but Tate shocked us all by remaining calm. We were so lucky to have a wonderful nurse who also happened to be the mom of one of my high school friends! Carla was really great at keeping me calm and making sure that Tate was taken care of. My dad held Tate while the doctor cleaned and stitched the wound. We were all amazed by his tolerance for pain! I was exhausted but so relieved that the whole thing had gone so much better than I ever could have imagined.

One Word Wednesday: Craziness

Pumpkin Patch

Yesterday we took the kids to visit the pumpkin patch. This is one of our annual fall traditions and it's one of the kids favorite activities. They always have such a great time at Summer's Farm. We typically go on a weekend, but this year our weekends have been pretty busy so we had to settle for a weekday evening.

This was the first year that Lana and Jackson were able to participate in all the fun activities. It's hard to believe but two years have passed since we ventured to the pumpkin patch for the first time with four children. The pumpkin patch was our first outing after we brought the twins home from the hospital! I remember thinking that I didn't want Nathan and Tate to miss out on their annual trip to the pumpkin patch but I think most of the people who saw us that day thought we were crazy!

They love visiting with the animals, going down the slides, playing in the corn cribs, pumping water for the duck races and finding their way through the mini-mazes. We didn't have time this year for jumping on the giant air pillow or any of the rides so the kids were a little disappointed, but they got over it. We took the last tractor ride out to the pumpking patch and let the kids pick out their pumpkins.

I think they all enjoyed the trip even if it was shorter than usual. Can you believe how much they've all grown in two years??? AMAZING!

Flashback Friday: Lana and Jackson's First Week Home

Lana and Jackson are turning two this month. It's hard to believe that it's been two years since they were born! When we found out we were having twins I was scared to death. I knew having a 4 year old, a 20 month old and two newborns was going to be hard. Looking back I think in a lot of ways it was a lot harder than I had expected, but in other ways it has been a lot easier. We have definitely faced many challenges, but it's funny how the bad moments are quickly forgotten and all you're left with are the precious memories you want to cherish. I probably wasn't always the best mom. Exhaustion certainly got the best of me on many occasions, but I think my kids will be left will happy memories from their childhoods. At least I hope so.

That first week the twins were home was much easier than I had expected. They slept a lot and our two older boys seemed to have adjusted well. It turns out that it was just a honeymoon period, but at the time it just seemed magical. I was so grateful to have two healthy babies who were born past 38 weeks and were both over 6 pounds. Our first baby had to spend 4 days in the NICU after he was born so we knew what to expect if one or both of the twins needed extra care, but when neither of them had to spend any time in the NICU we were shocked. I think we were still in a daze as we left the hospital with TWO babies.

Trying to balance the needs of four kids who were at three very different stages in their development turned out to be my biggest challenge the last two years. Just trying to make sure everyone got enough "Mommy Time" made my head spin. Nathan and Tate both had to grow-up a lot faster than they should have at that age, becoming more self-reliant than the average 4 and (almost) 2 year-olds. Looking back on the pictures from that first week I am struck with how little Tate was. Compared to the twins he seemed so big. We still call the twins "the babies," but they're already four months older than what Tate was when they were born!

I don't know what I'd do without my little guys! I'm beyond grateful that they arrived healthy and that they have stayed healthy. Looking back I remember how slow each day went by, it seemed to take an eternity to get to bedtime. But as I look back I'm simply amazed at how fast two years have flown by! I just hope the next 16 don't go that fast!